Redesigning life around my personality
- irisjonsthovel
- Jul 26
- 3 min read
Season’s greetings from the beautiful Lier Valley, where the sun has been shining bright and the evenings have been long and light!
It’s been an engaging couple of weeks here at the cottage. After spending two weeks in the Netherlands with friends and family at the start of July, which was absolutely wonderful and crammed with social activities, I returned home alone to a garden that had gone wild and was in need of some green-fingers. The zucchini plants I left behind had suddenly grown to enormous heights, and I found four zucchinis the size of my femurs that are only good for making litres of soup. Because of the heatwave and our lack of garden expertise, there was a sudden burst of flowers on too small a patch of soil, and the dried-out ones had pushed the new ones to the ground.
When the garden gets wild
So, I must say it was a bit of a shock returning to this graveyard of a garden, especially since my partner was away in Australia for work and another heatwave was approaching. I started deadheading spent flowers, pulling some out altogether, hunting for more zucchinis hiding beneath their leafy umbrellas, mowing the grass, picking kilos of currants, raspberries, and strawberries, and doing my best to keep everything moist enough to bring it back to life. It was a lot of work, and still is, and clearly not something I’m yet skilled enough to manage with grace, ha!
Confessions of a Winter Lover
However, I did enjoy the challenge, and coming home to a place that oozes vacation vibes is a true privilege. What’s funny though, although I know it’s an unpopular opinion, is that I’m not really a summer person. People are always raving about how much they look forward to summer: the long days, the breezy clothes, the outdoor activities, the sun on their skin. I nod along politely, but honestly? I don’t look forward to this. I’m a bit of a vampire during summer, hiding from the sun most of the day, afraid to get sunburned. I feel restless and a pressure to be outside all the time, and to stay up late because it’s still light out. None of it fits my homebody personality. I thrive in winter. The short days, the early evenings, staying in and making things, sitting by the fire. I know it might sound silly, especially since no one around me seems to feel the same, but I’m already looking forward to winter ;-)
Understanding myself through personality typing
It took me a while to be able to say that out loud, because people find it a bit strange. It was confusing for me too, feeling so uneasy during the season everyone else seems to love. But about ten years ago, when I felt completely out of place in my life - in my relationships, my work, my routines - I stumbled upon the 16 Personalities test. Turns out I’m an INFJ-T. Reading about that personality type was a turning point. It helped me understand why I craved time alone doing the things I loved, and why certain dynamics or environments left me feeling drained.
Redesigning life around my personality
That insight helped me slowly redesign my life. I started protecting my time and energy like it was something precious. I made movement and creativity the foundation of my days, not something to squeeze in if there was time left. I stopped apologising for being a homebody. I began honouring my need to create, even if it meant skipping social plans. I prioritised deep, nourishing relationships over maintaining big social circles.
For me, that’s what creative wellness is really about: living in alignment with who you truly are. Not the version that fits a job description, or someone else’s expectations, or the "summer-is-the-best" story. But the version of you that feels most like yourself when you are doing what you love, in a way that supports your own rhythm.
I hope this summer gives you permission to follow your own rhythm, whatever that looks like. And if you’ve never taken the 16 Personalities test, I highly recommend it!
Thank you, as always, for following along on my journey. Wishing you a beautiful rest of the summer!
Warmly,
Iris
Looking for a fun way to reflect on who you are?
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